The donor, the father, and the imaginary constitution of the family: Parents’ constructions in the case of donor insemination

Current international policy trends in the field of medically assisted conception are moving towards increased openness of information regarding the nature of conception where donated gametes are involved. In the case of donor insemination this means that the donor is no longer anonymous, offspring have the right to access information about the donor's identity, and parents are encouraged to tell children the nature of their donor-assisted conception. Until recently, however, the practice of donor insemination has tended to create the conditions for ignoring, or erasing, the existence of the donor as the provider of the gametes. Changing policy creates numerous challenges to this erasure, and to traditional conceptualisations of the father. This research is based on analysis of the narratives of a group of 41 New Zealand couples who conceived children with the assistance of donor insemination 15–18 years prior. This article focuses on their talk about the donor. The parents’ negation of the donor supports the normative formation of ‘family’, and is in turn supported by an instrumental and de-personalising discourse in relation to the donor. A tension is created within the parents’ talk whereby donors are negated and yet simultaneously appear as persons. We explore this discursive construction, suggesting that a new framework for thinking about donated gametes and the role of the donor is influencing parents’ narrations and understandings of family. We discuss these influences and examine their implications, particularly with respect to a separation of the bio-genetic from the social-environmental.