Compliments revisited: Contemporary compliments and gender

Pioneering work on compliments based on corpora collected almost 30 years ago examined the formulaic and gendered nature of compliments. However, the passage of time and questions about collection methods justify a new data collection and analysis. This article is based on two corpora of compliments among status equals collected on a small Midwestern campus in the US in 2008 and 2010. Analysis of the corpora reveals the importance of distinguishing between compliments given in unstructured versus goal-oriented settings. In unstructured settings, appearance compliments between women on apparel and hairstyle predominated and served as phatic communication that reinforced the norm of effortful attention to daily appearance. In goal-oriented settings, however, men and women gave and received compliments on an almost equal basis, with men giving and receiving slightly more compliments than women. For both men and women, compliments on performance far outnumbered all other topics in goal-oriented settings. Men's use of performance compliments on sports in unstructured settings, however, suggests that men used these types of compliments to each other to reinforce values of heterosexual masculinity. Through the types of compliments they gave, men and women revealed gendered values.

► A new corpus of compliments is presented.
► Setting determines compliment use by men and women.
► Both genders compliment performance equally in goal-oriented activities.
► Male-to-male sports compliments reinforce masculinity.
► Women use appearance compliments as phatic communication in unstructured settings.